One foor in front if another.

It's been 7 months since I was diagnosed with Bipolar II. I still am having problems coming to terms with it.

The medication has had a strange effect. I barely eat anymore because I am just not hungry as I am still loosng weight. This is not a bad thing because I was terribly over weight... not quite clinically obses but not far off it. I try and food in the flat so I will have something in the house to eat should I want it.  I usually force myself to eat a bowl of cereal. Luckily I am addicted to Aldis Wheatabix, also their medium cheddar is amazing so can be found occasionally be found making a cheese sandwhuch at rediculous time of the morning when I've been on the go for the past few days. Even my new clothes don't fit anymore. I only bought them six months ago!  The medication doesn't help with the mania and in fact have prolonged them. I've been up for almost two months now with no sign of crashing.  I am also beginning to firget to take my medication which happens. I am asthmatic and don't take my inhalers properly and if I am antibiotics I am known not to finish the course because I just forget.  Today is the first time in four days I've taken my medication. It doesn't help that I tried to contact my CPN about the mania just to be told that I need to ride it out and that no other medication would be perscribed. Niiice!. If they don't care why the fuck should I!

In November I applied for Personal Independant Payment. It was rejected first time. I put it in for manditory reconsideration and failed again, so I took it to tribunal. That was a royal pain in the ass. Not only did I have to find the courts which where so hidden that they are easy to miss, I had t I sut there whilst 3 strangers made judgements on my life to weather ir not I deserve additional money to get help in my life. It took about an hour. I won this. Not only did I win this, I assumed I would get the standard rate... nope I got the enhased rate and it gets back paid to Novemeber. The really annoying thing is that if I won the PIP in November I would have got additional support with my rent whilst on SSP. Insane right. I am now working full time, getting some benefits and doing okay financially but when I really needed it I got very little support. How to keep yourself well.... have money problems.

My new job is going really well. It's a job I will do really well once I get settled and undersrand the systems that they use. I am doing the assessors qual right now. Then i will finish the L5 L&D I am on then i will do my quality assurance qual. I think there is one qual after that to get and I will be as qualified as an assessor can get. It will be awesome. Most this I should do in the next 12 months if not before. I travel a lot for the job but this gets included in our hours.