Yet another dream

I had another one of my dreams last night. It felt so real. It's insane how I want this to happen to me. This can not be normal.

I can still feel and remember the entire thing in detail. These dreams are dreams that I alway's remember in detail. Other dreams fade, but not these. These dreams awake something up inside of me. Make me feel real. Isn't it insane the way that for me to feel real I have to dream, be alseep. That is not normal at all. I know that, we all know that. But I can't help the way I feel.

Germany was bad. It didn't do much for me. I became really depressed at one point, and thought about cutting myself. In fact the only thing that stopped me was my inability to find something to cut myself with. I cried and cried. I couldn't cope. I had to spend one day locked in my room crying and sleeping to feel even slightly better. Then I drank myself to sleep. I have to find a better way of dealing with these feelings.

I also have some other news, but that needs to wait unti next week. I promised I would tell people until I have told one special person. One I've told them I will blab it all to the world.

Update

Things are going okay. My parish priest has gone away for a while and hopfully this will mean that my mother will relax a wee bit and will manage to climb the ever increasing mountain of paper work that appears on her desk. With the priest being so ill, mam has found it hard to get any work done, he wants things read to him (since his eye sight is shot), he wants the know what's going on so Mam keeps running up and down the stairs doing what ever it is he needs, but this means that the mountain is not being scaled.

She came home last night, she managed to finish to files. She only has another 10 to go!

I'm sitting in my office, desperately trying to get my report written but I have no enegy to do it whatsoever. I just want to sleep, relax and find out what the hell is wrong with my computer. Currently I am at work typing this, procrastinating from my report.

Never mind, having my legs waxes later on today, and next thursday I fly out to Germany for World Youth Day for 12 days. Life's not all bad, at times.